Weird advertisements and extra-terristrial advertisers

Anyone who watches the channel ZOOM in the afternoon is surely guaranteed a laugh. Yes, I am referring to those sky shop ads which go on for about half an hour in an attempt to sell us products that will makes us look fairer, taller, slimmer and so on and so forth.

Advertisement 1: Roopamrit ..Yes,this one's to make us look fairer.It starts of with a firang looking aurat who has a highly indianised accent and the lips aren't even synced. They then go on to tell us the tale of some poor dark complexioned (or should i say unnecessary durt thopofied on the face such that the face and neck are too highly distinct colours!!) damsel in distress in a mahabharat-type setting. The girl is on the verge of womanhood, but she's dark and sigh,therefore she can't find a husband. Her father looks like some mahabharata ramayana hero (sheesh..mythology was never for me) complete with pearls,swords and a crown!! and after much thinking takes her to this pujari who grants her roopamrit or rather some out-of-the-world mixture made ONLY from weird-ass-herbs which probably don't even exist straight from the amazon forests!! (sheesh..that way shouldn't south american people be sparkly white) Soon after putting on the cream she miraculously becomes fair!! (or rather,the dirt is wiped off the face) and then of course,hundreds of suitors line up at their doorstep,she gets married and everyone lives happily ever after...and all this for "only" Rs.995 a bottle!!

Advertisement 2:Yoco height increaser....yes,as the name suggests this one guarantees to increase your height by few INCHES!! (lol..whatever happened to drinking a lot of milk in bachpan?!!?)So again the tale of a "sundar, susheel, gori, padhi-likhi ladki ladki" who unfortunately was not blessed by god with a good height and after being turned down by many potential husbands, she decided to take yoco height increaser. You see, yoco height increaser is made with special formula consisting of potassi-manganese biacarbonates sulphur dicoxides (don't care to correct me mini) in the lab (mind you, all this being told to you by the stereotypical mad-scientist kind of guy...complete with big white hair and all..only no broken specs) and one is supposed to rub them onto the sole of the foot and then wear shoes which are specially lined with some god-for-saken plastic.This is followed by testimonials of people who used this product and successfully increased their height by about 3-5 inches!! One which I particularly remember was the Rocky Vicky Monty type stud boy, complete with leather jacket and muscles whose only problem was that he was short and after using this product, "saari ladkiyan mujh par marti hain"!! (sigh, I would sooner apply the aforesaid mud on my face than date this guy). So, of course, the girl referred to at the beginning of the ad then uses this product, becomes tall, finds a husband and lives happily ever after..all this only for Rs.2000!! Lol..any takers?